Carolyn Moos, Jason Collins' Ex-Fiance, Still 'Deeply Hurt' After Discovering He's Gay
Moos Had '8 Years Taken Away' From Her in a Relationship With Collins
Carolyn Moos, Jason Collins' ex-fiance, said she remains "deeply hurt" at the way Collins treated her by calling off their wedding four years ago and how he revealed his homosexual tendencies to the world. Moos said that although Collins' has had time for the press and phone calls from President Obama, he still hasn't personally discussed his homosexuality with her.
Carolyn Moos, a former WNBA player, was with Jason Collins for seven years before he proposed; she recalled how he told her she was "his soul mate and I was meant for him." A year later, in 2009, he called off the wedding with no explanation. Moos was nearly 30, and "questioned" what she had done wrong.
"When I couldn't get answers from Jason on what had gone wrong, I questioned myself and what I could have done better or differently. I should have been questioning him, but I didn't think to do so at all," she told Cosmopolitan magazine. "In the years that followed … I had a full life. But when it came to Jason, deep sadness and confusion remained."
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In April of this year, Collins finally revealed to her his homosexuality the same day the Sports Illustrated article came out.
"Jason told me he's gay over the phone on a Monday morning in April, the same day the magazine hit newsstands," Moos wrote. "However, he didn't mention the article – that came as a surprise when I heard about it from a friend."
Moos revealed that Jason hasn't had time with her since then, and although she empathizes with him, she has not forgiven him.
"I empathize with Jason and support him. But at the same time, I remain deeply hurt by him. I wish he could have been honest with me years ago … He's being hailed as a pioneer, but I believe true heroism is a result of being honest with yourself and with those you love," she wrote.
Moos, who is now 35, was worried about having children- fearing she wouldn't meet Mr. Right until it was too late, the 6-foot-5-inch physical trainer froze her eggs "as a backup plan," she told Piers Morgan.
"So many women think about this as a plan or option," she said on CNN. "But few have had eight years taken away from them like I did."
Collins felt during his engagement to Moos that he would be "ruining her life and [his own] life, leading to a life of unhappiness" if he had gone through with the wedding, but still could not be honest with her about his struggle.
"I wish I could have told her the complete truth at that time," he told Oprah Winfrey in May. "But I wasn't there yet."
