Saddleback Pastor on How to Have a Marriage Last a Lifetime
Sharing the third decision needed for a lasting love, Pastor Holladay said we got to be humble with all our hearts. "I could have said, 'Be unselfish,' but the fact of the matter is, humility is the key to be unselfish."
He read out Philippians 2:3, which instructs, "Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves …"
Giving something to get something back is not being unselfish, that's business, Holladay said. "Unselfishness is, 'I'm gonna consider you more important than me.'"
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That doesn't mean you consider yourself less important, he clarified. "You're a creation of God, God's child." You have the power to consider the other person more important, he explained.
Do not keep scores in the marriage, he advised. Take the initiative and move closer to your spouse when there is tension, he said.
The fourth decision, he went on to share, is, love God with all your heart.
God created and us and marriage, so for us to live well and have a lasting marriage, we need to love Him, he said, quoting Mark 12:30, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength."
"The closer you get to God, the closer you get to each other," the pastor said.
He concluded the message stressing that we cannot do these four things in our own strength. "I need God's strength to do these four things," he said.
Founding Pastor Rick Warren also appeared before and after the sermon. Standing next to his wife, Kay Warren, he told the congregation they have been married for 40 years. "I'm hopelessly in love with this woman," he said.
Before married couples renewed their vows during the worship service, Warren read 1 Corinthians 13:3-8: "If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away."
There are three things that last forever, Warren said, and "real love lasts forever."
