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Comedy Central Roast of Charlie Sheen: Highlights

The highly advertised Comedy Central Roast of Charlie Sheen has effectively put the troubled actor in his place during a nearly three-hour segment.

Airing Monday night, Mike Tyson, William Shatner, actress Kate Walch, and several comedians delivered blow after blow to Sheen’s infamous ego, riffing on his high-profile year.

Jokes included Priceline pitchman Shatner telling Sheen to “book your next rehab stay through Priceline.com.”

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Also, Roastmaster and the creator of “Family Guy” Seth MacFarlane quipped that Sheen has just celebrated his 46th birthday, “A statement nobody thought they’d ever hear.”

The comedian added, “Honestly Charlie, I never thought I’d live to see the night you’d live to see this night,” about the Comedy Central special.

Actress on “Grey’s Anatomy” Walch roasted Sheen about how much he has abused his lungs and liver.

Throughout the roast, the former “Two and a Half Men” actor appeared smiling. Taking the stage himself toward the end of the segment, Sheen said, "Till tonight, I didn't realize how [messed] up I was."

Sheen later declared himself “unscathed,” and said, “You can’t hurt me.”

Continuing, Sheen said in a cheerful tone, “I can’t even hurt me. Drugs couldn’t kill me. Sex couldn’t kill me. The press couldn’t kill me. “Two and a Half Men” couldn’t kill me. Did you really think your little jokes were gonna hurt me?”

About being fired from CBS in March, Sheen says, “I had my own television show… and I did the one thing everyone in America wishes they could do: I told my boss to [eff] off. And then it was gone- in one public fiery flameout.”

Sheen expresses his gratitude for his family, and adds that he is done with “winning,” that he feels he has already won.

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