'Duck Dynasty' couple say God’s grace healed them after affair, abortion
Al and Lisa Robertson of the "Duck Dynasty" family discussed how God's grace healed them after Lisa had an extramarital affair and a past abortion.
During a July 2 interview with Cornerstone Chapel Pastor Gary Hamrick as part of a marriage conference at the Virginia megachurch, Lisa Robertson detailed how she has sought grace and forgiveness for her past after she had an abortion at 16, and later cheated on her husband.
“You have to realize that this is a sinful situation. When I was having the affair, I knew it was wrong. I knew it was a sinful situation. But I never really saw myself in the situation until I was able to openly confess the things that I had been doing,” Lisa said.
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“Whenever those sins came out of my mouth, and they went back ... all the way to whenever I was a little girl. Whenever those came out of my mouth, it was almost like I didn't even know who I was. I didn't even recognize myself."
Lisa, who married Al when she was 18, said that having an affair was never a decision she ever imagined herself making when they tied the knot.
“Whenever you're standing before the preacher, this is not what your plan is. You're 18 years old and you're saying, 'One day, 15 years down the road, I'm going to have an affair.’ No, that's not how it is. Satan gets into the middle of your life and he puts his foothold there and you do things that you never could have imagined,” she said.
Speaking to listeners who might be feeling guilt as a result of cheating on their spouses, Lisa advised, “the most important thing that I want people to know is that Jesus Christ died for all of those sins.”
“He died for the person that committed murder like I did at 16 years old, having an abortion. He died for the person who slept around as a teenager, which was me. He died for the person who had an affair on their husband, and lied and cheated and stole,” she said.
“He died for all of those sins, everything that you can imagine. Christ took all of those sins to the cross with Him. And He did that so that we wouldn't have to pay the penalty. Because the penalty is death. And so, whenever He took that, He took the death; He took the penalty; He took the shame and the guilt, and He ridded us of it.”
Lisa said after her affair, she found comfort in reading the Word of God because she read scriptures that helped her to focus on God’s capabilities to make her pure.
“You can pray that prayer, 'God, please just purify my heart.' Whenever you get to that point, it's easier for you to accept those things and to accept God's forgiveness. But God's forgiveness is what you got to have first. Because you can never forgive yourself until you've got God's forgiveness,” she added.
Lisa noted that although she received forgiveness from her husband and God, the forgiveness will never take away the continual regret she feels for what she did.
She said while feeling regret will never leave, shame should not remain with a person forever because of the mercy found in Jesus, adding, "the shame is at the cross."
"The regret you’re always going to have. Because we do things to hurt people that we never wanted to do. Well, if I forget that, how much easier is that going to be for me to do it again?” Lisa cautioned.
“I continue to hold onto that regret because I want that regret to remind me of what I did. But also, I want God's mercy to remind me of where he brought me from."
While Lisa had to seek God’s forgiveness, as well as learn to forgive herself for her affair, she said her husband also had to grow to forgive her for cheating.
Al shared with listeners how he was able to forgive his wife and find healing from God. He also shared a few key ways to forgive in a godly manner.
“I think that, first and foremost, is to really realize God's forgiveness. And then, how that relates to us. The Bible talks a lot about ‘forgive others as God forgave you.’ And people have taken that as sort of a command, and it is. But beyond the command, I think what He's trying to relay to us is, ‘Look, I've forgiven you of everything,’” he said.
“He says, ‘I'll forgive you and remember your sins no more.’ Meaning that’s cleansed, that’s washed away, that’s forgotten. And so, when I began to look at forgiveness, whether it’s Lisa my wife, or some other person in my life, then what I'm saying is that that's when I'm the most like God is when I can extend that. And like Him, I want forgiveness to be something that then doesn't hurt us, that helps us going forward.”
Many times in relationships, particularly in his own marriage, Al said, he found that when there's been an affair or something similar in a marriage relationship, the offense becomes something that's a source of pain in the future because it continues to be brought up.
“When that happens, forgiveness either wasn't really extended or wasn't really accepted. Because when [forgiveness] happens, you can move forward. But when it doesn't happen, it's very difficult to move forward,” Al explained.
“I think that's why you see that sort of quid-pro-quo effect from God to us, us to one another, because that's what it does. It builds that in people. And so, we meet a lot of couples and they'll make a decision to stay together after an affair or something really difficult,” he added.
“Sometimes, forgiveness, it takes a while for true forgiveness to then be extended and accepted because it has to work both ways.”
Nicole Alcindor is a reporter for The Christian Post.
