Evangelical pastor identifies when it's OK to move to a different church
Pastor J.D. Greear laid out a general guideline for those asking whether it’s time to leave a certain church but stressed that it is “better to be really connected at a mediocre church than partially committed at the best one.”
“We live in a consumer culture and that, unfortunately, as affected how we approach the church,” Greear, president of the Southern Baptist Convention and pastor of The Summit Church in Durham, North Carolina, said in a recent episode of his “Ask Me Anything” podcast, adding that while consumer culture works for some things, it should not apply to the church.
“It’s not appropriate when it comes to family; ... the church is, in a huge sense, family,” he said.
“There might be a time where you do think it’s wise to leave a church but it shouldn’t be light and flippant,” he continued. Yet, at the same time, Greear pointed out that because we only have “one life to live,” it’s important to “stay as spiritually healthy” as possible.
“[I need to be] a part of a family that brings out the best in me and helps my ministry gifts come alive,” he stressed.
Greear then identified some common mistakes people make when it comes to the decision. Sometimes, people leave because they’re simply bored of their church or the “hottest new show” comes to town.
“The worst is when you have people who go to different churches for different things,” he said. “It is better to be really connected at a mediocre church than partially committed at the best one.”
Other times, people are “always thinking about their needs,” Greear said, comparing such Christians to children who are self-focused instead of thinking about the larger needs of the community.
He pointed out that Paul tells the Ephesian believers to “grow up” (Eph 4:1-16), which he defined as learning to use your spiritual gift in the church, not being fed and having individual needs met each week.
Other times, people “wait too long” and stay at a dying church, effectively “wasting” years that could have been spent at a growing, thriving organization.
Still, there are some non-negotiables for churches, Greear said, beginning with a commitment to a theologically-sound, historic belief statement such as an evangelical creed.
“They’re not caving on issues that are tension points today,” he said, specifically referring to issues of gender and sexuality.
“If a church shows unfaithfulness there, I just wouldn’t have me or my family in that,” he said.
People should also leave churches that fail to preach from Word from the pulpit and instead become “opinion hour,” Greear said. It’s also unwise to attend churches that are inward-focused or tolerate sin, he added.
“It’s hard to give a litmus test or a checklist,” he said. “I would encourage you to stay between those two poles: I don’t want to be a consumer, I want to be a family member ... on the other side, you need to sense the leadership of the Holy Spirit and be part of a family where I’m growing.”
“You need a place where the Word is enlivening you and where it’s good for your family and where your ministry gifts are being capitalized on and put into practice,” Greear emphasized.
“If you’re in a church where it’s just not happening and you think there’s a possibility of change, my counsel is usually to stay for a little while, pray, and if you see signs that God is moving, then stay. If not, then you should ... invest elsewhere.”
“Be committed,” he concluded. “Don’t just be a contributor; be all in.”
A recent study from LifeWay research found that half of devoted church members (48%) only leave if they have to move to a new home.
Meanwhile, 19% said they leave a church when the preaching style changes, 12% when the pastor leaves, 9% leave due to politics, 5% due to music changes, and 4% because of personal conflicts.
When it comes to the issue of discerning when it’s time to leave a certain church, theologian John Piper recommended first identifying the markers of a healthy church body.
“Number one, its leaders, elders, pastors, whatever that church calls them, the New Testament calls them elders or overseers or pastors, they minister the Word of God fully and faithfully,” he said.
“Number two, they minister the Lord’s supper and baptism,” Piper continued. “And, number three, they exercise church discipline excluding from membership those who walk in a way that contracts the Gospel or brings reproach upon the Lord.”
Finally, members of a healthy church “love each other and they love the community and they are seeking to win the lost to reach the nations, the mission of the Church in other words.”
“So any one of those four could be missing and serious and therefore lead a person to begin looking for another church,” he explained.
“You are not free to go nowhere,” Piper said. “Not being in a church is not a New Testament option. To belong to Christ is to belong to a body of believers effective or perfect. There aren’t any perfect ones.”