Interview: Charles R. Swindoll on Public Speaking and Letting God Lead Our Lives
Charles R. Swindoll, an internationally admired evangelical pastor, has just penned a new book about his growing up with a speech impediment and how, with God's help, he was able to overcome that and help others to find the strength to overcome the challenges in their lives.
Dr. Swindoll recently spoke with The Christian Post about his life as well as the inspiration and drive behind his new book.
CP: Would you share with us the idea behind your new book Saying It Well and what your aim for the book was?
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Swindoll: I've been doing what I have been doing for about 50 years. It occurred to me that it would be helpful if the general public understood not only my philosophy for speaking publicly but also something about the process.
At first I was a little hesitant about doing that because I am not one to call attention to myself. They wanted a lot of it to be in first person and that wasn't a thrilling idea to me. I always enjoyed writing on biographies but someone else's rather than my own. However, I thought it would be helpful to know from own end and my own lips, as it were, what I go through and the process that is involved in that. So I addressed everything from my calling and preparing all the way down to the process of putting a message together. However you want to call it, some people are public speakers, others are leaders of large companies and they are required to speak publicly regarding that company, still others present papers and technical information. The point is we are all involved in communication, some of us more than others. I thought it would be helpful if I put that in print so that it would help others go through the process themselves. That was what drove me to write the book.
CP: In the book you reveal that despite your success at being a communicator it was not always that easy for you. The speech problem you experienced was paralyzing for you, how did that shape your vocational view point?
Swindoll: You are referring to my battling with stuttering when I was younger. If anyone has ever seen the movie "The King's Speech," though I am not in a category of a king, they will see something of the struggle that I went through. There is nothing more fearful for the average person in our society than to stand before a group of people and speak. When you add to that the battle of stuttering, your problem is exacerbated beyond words.
So when I began to learn how to speak I still had the fear because I always had my speaking interrupted with the impediment. So it took some time to gain confidence over that. I am thankful that over time I have been able to conquer that battle though admittedly there are still times that I go back to the principles that were taught by my speech teacher. My book is designed not to hide that, but to highlight it and to let people know that even if you struggle with some fears or an impediment in your speech, there is help available. You can conquer that and go on to be successful as a speaker or as a preacher or whatever is your calling.
CP: Would you mind sharing some tips that you discuss in your book that helped you?
Swindoll: What I think I was doing back when it was at its worst, I think my mind was racing ahead of my ability to put it into words. I had to learn to pace my speaking. The use of pauses was really helpful. Knowing that some words come more difficult than others I have found it helpful that when I get to some of those words that I pause, say it in my mind, and then I speak it more deliberately.
I would say also that if you can find ways in your life to conquer the fear of falling on your face or in some ways appearing foolish in front of an audience it would be helpful. I found several things come to my rescue; one is a good sense of humor. I am often the brunt of my own humor. People feel comfortable when you share stories like that. Also, when you realize this is something you struggle with just admitting it is helpful that way when you experience it no one is surprise or embarrassed. It is very helpful to remember that when you stand in front of a group, and I mean this in the right sense, they want you to succeed. They are not looking at you with suspicion or alterative motives they really want you to connect with them. I call it being on your side. Most listeners are on the side of the speakers. Now there are exceptions, but generally speaking whether you are preacher or a public speaker or delivering information that will help people, they want you to succeed. So when you tell yourself that it keeps you from feeling so self-conscious our uneasy when you are in front of a group.
CP: What would you say is the most import milestone in your 50 years?
Swindoll: I believe I would say the influence of mentors in my life. I have been privileged to have been near and to spend time with several individuals who marked my life. They believed in me long before I believed in myself. They saw potential in me that I did not see in myself. They were affirming and encouraging. Furthermore, they were willing to open their lives and let me know some of the secrets of their success. The presence of mentors has meant the world to me.
I would also add that preparing for a sufficient period of time before you jump into the action. Most people rush into their calling rather that move into it more slowly and deliberately. I felt like I needed good schooling. I felt like I needed the training alongside experienced individuals. I also felt that I needed the smarts to start small and work from there so that when I was before a larger group it was not intimidating nor would it have the effect on me that it otherwise might had such as going to my head or becoming arrogant or unaccountable. I think when you go through the process of preparing well, slowly and well, you cover those bases so carefully that you don't run the risk of being an overnight success that works against you.
The best illustration I can think of would be a member of the pro-ball players. They are skillful in one particular area maybe they can put a basketball through the hoop better than others or run faster than others or they can play the game of football to a point of excellence. And the result is when they are still in their late teens or early twenties they are suddenly in the big time. They are making millions and doing it before huge crowds who usually do nothing but applaud them or putting them at the head of the line or somehow feed their ego that does a number on you when you're young and inexperienced. So I had enough presence of mind to think rather than jump into this to quickly, I would take my time and prepare well.
One thing I have appreciated over the years, I'll put it this way, when I began in ministry I spent the first 20 years preparing for the next 20 years learning and from then on teaching and preaching. If I had to do it over again I would spend more time training and preparing and less time teaching. What is meant by that is obviously in order for you to be prepared for what goes along with being successful you need to spend sufficient time in the shadows out of the lime light and making sure you have the maturity that can handle that kind of "penthouse" treatment. Very few people can experience early success without it going to their heads. So if you prepare carefully and well that won't happen.
CP: Can you explain why your book is being described as a "spiritual autobiography?"
Swindoll: I was doing a tour of duty in the marine core and I was stationed overseas far away on the island of Okinawa. While I was there I met a man who became one of my first mentors and I was engaged in different phases of ministries with him. I led a small bible study group. I was a part of a gathering on Fridays where in the evening we would hold services for the military on the island. Little by little he would turn over some of those responsibilities to me and by and by over the months he had me lead and finally I was in charge of the whole thing. In that process I learned how satisfying that was, how easily it seemed to flow in my life and I began to think perhaps I should do this and in what the Lord would call my career.
So I said to Bob Newkirk, "I'm thinking about being involved in this for the rest of my life," and he said it makes all the sense in the world to me. He encouraged me to think about that and I realized I had to go back to graduate school to prepare. He said, "I would do that if I was you."
So I wrote my wife and said to her let me tell you what is going on in my life. I want to know what you think about it. She was thrilled and delighted to know that this was the way I was being led. Through the affirmation of Bob, my wife, and when I got into the seminary, under the influence of various professors and mentors, I had that confirmed to me in a number of different ways. I felt that sense of calling in the ministry.
When you do what you do with joy and a sense of ease a measure of success other people will comment and will thank you, will talk about how the Lord spoke to you with something that you said or you are helpful in presenting certain truths that they had not seen before, all of that goes into the confirmation of your calling and that is what happened to me and my life.
CP: Could you offer some tips that anyone could use for public speaking?
Swindoll: I think it is important to begin with a statement in your speech that grabs the attention of the audience. I try to make my opening line 15 words or less. It is the only part of my speech that I memorize and it doesn't have to be profound, but if it carries with it something that breaks the "ho-hum" of the audience then I think that is a great way to start.
After you have begun with that opening statement you need to have an introduction that helps the audience know that what you are saying is important. Some of the things you can do is help convince them of the value of what you are talking about.
Once you have done that then you move into the body of your speech that has progression. You move from one point to the next and on to the next, perhaps to four or five points and along away you do a little review of what you just presented. Then you bring up a new point to develop. As you are moving along through the speech you are moving towards a conclusion, this is the part many people leave out. Just as you need to have a good takeoff, you need to have good landing. If you have done everything except land well you haven't succeeded. So instead of just bouncing on the ground when you land you need to have a smooth landing.
In addition to that you need to remember to quit while they are still wanting more. I think that sometimes speeches go on so long that the audience loses interest. One other thing I would say is that the use of humor is very useful. However, humor is risky; you can't just stand there and be a silly jokester. People didn't come to sit to listen to your jokes that you picked up off the internet or something that flashes through your mind. Humor needs to be well placed and it needs to be natural. It needs to have an authenticity about it that causes the audience to see your point. In other words when you use humor it is not just to tell jokes, humor is a light-hearted comment or story that helps communicate what you are trying to get across. An audience appreciates that.
I watch my audience very carefully. It is helpful when the speaker is sensitive to the audience. You can see signs of boredom if you look closely. Just talking longer will not break the boredom sometimes telling a story or using an illustration or saying something that is familiar in a new way will help keep the interest of the audience as you speak.
CP: Can some of the techniques you speak of be used in a more intimate setting, for example, a married couple who may have trouble communicating?
Swindoll: When you speak in front of an audience one person speaks and everybody else listens. When you're in your home you need to be a better listener than speaker. You need to feel what the other person is feeling and you do that by asking questions, but sometimes it is just repeating what they said. Like I understand that you are saying so and so or correct me if I'm wrong, that engages the other person and lets them know that you care.
I would also say that when there is a great amount of emotion involved, which isn't uncommon between a husband and wife or roommates or classmates when you're talking in a small setting. It is very import that you respect the feelings of the other person. I guess if there is one mistake made more than any other it is made by the person that makes his or her living speaking publicly and then trying to communicate personally with those that mean the most to them, they are often a complete flop. And the reason is they're used to just one person delivering a message, they are not dialoguing, they are not very good listeners or they often lack respect for the feelings of others. They don't do well with criticism or listening to a comment made that they don't agree with and knowing how to say it without offending the other person. When you are in dialogue and you offend the other individual, they are throwing an anchor out of the boat and it is stopping all movement forward until you drag that anchor back in.
So the sensitive communicator hears that the anchor has been dropped and pauses and you talk about what it is that causes the person to react like they did. For example, I'm talking to a teenage son and I will say to him, "I am concerned about the time you come at night. I've asked you to come in at midnight and you have been coming at one or two in the morning. I want you to stop doing that."
Suddenly, they are on the defensive and it may be more helpful saying, "You know son there is no good that happens on the street after midnight.
Often that is when there is danger or often that is when people get into trouble and that is when most crime occurs. I am concerned with your safety. I trust you but I can't trust others on the street when it's that late so I want you to remember the importance of how much you mean to me and how valuable you are to me and I need to hear from you if you are going to be out later, to call me, how do you feel about that?"
Put that question out so the person knows that this is not a lecture this is something I feel strongly about for your good because I love you and because I respect you and I think when you communicate those feelings the person is really on your side. The secret of having a conversation is engagement.
CP: Can you explain let "God Be God" that you share in the book?
Swindoll: I believe firmly in God's control in life. I don't believe that God is impotent and struggling to see what is going on. I believe he directs the affairs in life. Now there is also wrong and sinfulness and he's not responsible for that, but when you are going through life, and certain things occur that you didn't expect or perhaps it's something painful and you think that the God you believe in and the Lord you serve is really calling the shots in your life, you need to let God be God. Don't try to top what God is doing, don't fight it, don't work against it.
I tell a story of my going overseas. I struggled greatly with why on earth will I be led by God to walk away from my wife and get on a troop ship and go 8,000 miles away to the middle of the Far East in a remote island in the middle of the Japanese sea. Spend 16 months in the marines far away from my family and friends, until I realized that I need to let God be God. He was doing something in my life and my attitude should be ok. There are things I can learn in this experience but if I fight God on this, if I go at this from a selfish vantage point I will learn very little.
But if I say to myself there are things that I am going to learn here that I will not learn anywhere else and they will benefit me in the long haul. I need to realize the role of God in my life and in doing so I want to learn everything I can learn in the process so that I am a better man, I become more mature, I will learn how to control my attitude and I gain experience that I will never gain if I remain at home surrounded by the familiar.
When that finally grabbed hold of me the difference was night and day. I was not fighting God I was letting God be God. I was saying to him, "ok you're in charge I'm not and I'm going to help you teach me whatever I have to learn," and the process let me learn it well so that I can be a deeper and more mature individual as a result of going through this. That is what I meant when I said let God be God.
