Kathleen Frank, Author of 'I'm Fat and Nobody Cares': Look Past the Outside and Love Unconditionally
Kathleen Frank spent a portion of her life being overweight in a very self-conscious society. Her new book, "I'm Fat and Nobody Cares," seeks to explore the hurt that caused her to put on the weight, and the way her relationship with God helped her shed the pounds and renew her zest for life.
The Christian Post: Did you choose this particular title because it describes how you felt when you were overweight?
Frank: I felt that way until I started getting healing from the abuse- felt that way my entire life, especially as I started getting really overweight and during my career. People will just stare at you… can make you feel humiliated. When I say nobody cares, it's like looking at someone who is disabled, staring, and not being kind or sensitive. They just look at your outer appearance.
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CP: With society the way it is, do you think it's still more about weight or about the inner person?
Frank: You don't see too many well-known people with a huge weight problem; when you do, you see them get ridiculed. People are insensitive- they think you're a glutton, are lazy. They don't understand that people are having emotional issues and are hiding themselves in their weight. I never had an eating disorder, ate junk food … I realized that the reason why I battled with weight was because of the trauma. I used the weight as a way to protect.
We can gain weight just by thinking about it- not always about the calories. Our mindset can often determine how we hold on to the weight. I lost over 100 pounds when I started my healing simply because I was receiving healing; I wasn't doing anything differently. I've always been one to eat healthy; it's part of my lifestyle. I would just like people to be more kind and compassionate- don't try to judge but try to get to know them, love them unconditionally.
CP: What is the healing that you received?
Frank: The healing I received was forgiveness- when you go through a trauma you have to forgive those that caused it. I led my dad to the Lord when he was on his deathbed … wanted to have that moment where I could forgive him. He woke up out of a diabetic coma and he asked for forgiveness. I took that as a healing moment- the very next day he went back into the coma and died that night. I had already forgiven him.
Then I had to forgive my mother; I told her about the molestation but she didn't believe me. I had to live in the house knowing he violated me and would continue to try and violate me. It took me a lot of years to forgive her and it was through the book. It was not originally meant to be published but was a journal for me to remember what happened … it took me 10 years to write because I had to go through the process of being restored and set free.
CP: What is your relationship with God like now?
Frank: I went through an inner-healing process of discovering where God was throughout the abuse and then forgave God. Once I went through all of that, I was set free. I re-read the book and didn't feel the same way; I felt I needed to rewrite the book and write it to help others. The unforgiveness and bitterness I felt helped people.
I didn't know who I was in Christ- I thought God had a bat in his hand, ready to use it when I messed up. Often we think that our Heavenly Father is our earthly father and if either of those relationships is not healthy, it makes it hard to forgive. I had to find out who God was, how He felt about it. Forgiveness of the people who harmed you and the journey to know who I am in Christ and how much He loves me. To have that intimacy with God- I'm about halfway there in our relationship. It's a daily process for me.
CP: What have the responses been like?
Frank: I've had positive responses to the book: "Good for you!" "Glad you did this!" I've had comments from people who are being healed by the book. One person who interviewed me said she was hurt and is now recommending it to everyone. Even knowing everything I know now, I would publish the book. There are so many people out there who are struggling with this trauma in their lives. It would be selfish of me if I didn't share this with others.
All the proceeds go to Restoration Life Foundation that helps girls from 16 and older receive free counseling, inner healing, a place to stay if they need a community to live. These girls need to know unconditional love. I'd eventually like to open a Foundation in India, the Philippines, Africa and China to offer these women and girls a new, restored life.
You can purchase "I'm Fat and Nobody Cares" on Amazon or Barnes & Noble. To learn more about the Restoration Life Foundation, please click here.
