Mutual Submission
And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
- Ephesians 5:21
Sometimes people get offended because the Bible says that wives are to submit to their husbands (see Ephesians 5:22). They say they don't like this because it is chauvinistic, and they will not submit to anyone. But here is the problem. That very attitude says to me that such a person will have problems in marriage.
First, let me give you the big picture: before a word is said in the Bible about wives submitting to their husbands or husbands loving their wives as Christ loves the church (which is no small feat, by the way), it says that we should submit ourselves to one another in the fear of God (see Ephesians 5:21).
So let's not get upset about the fact that the Bible tells wives to submit to their husbands. Let's remember the Bible also says that we are to submit to one another. And let's understand the meaning of the actual word as it is being used. It is a military term that means "to rank beneath." That doesn't mean a husband is abdicating his responsibility of leadership in the home; it simply means that a husband is helping his wife to bear her burdens. It also means that a wife is doing the same for her husband.
How different marriages would be today if a husband and wife both entered into their marriage by asking themselves, How can I meet my spouse's needs? How can I fulfill my spouse? I believe it would make all the difference in the world.
Instead, so many couples start out their marriage with an attitude that says, "I won't do this, and you need to. . . ." But that is not the way marriage works. We are to submit to one another in the fear of God