No Remarrying While Ex-Spouse Is Living

By John Piper, Christian Post Guest Columnist Sunday, October 23, 2011

The following is an edited transcript of the audio.

Can you give some advice to those who know others seeking to remarry or divorce?

Well, let's lay the foundations for just a moment. This is just so huge and so painful and so difficult. Death is way easier to handle than divorce, right?

I think the ideal that Jesus teaches is that we shouldn't divorce and remarry while the spouse divorced is living. That's very conservative and very narrow. But that's what I think Jesus teaches in Luke 16:18 and Mark 10:9 and what Paul is saying in Romans 7:1-3 and 1 Corinthians 7. So that's where I am.

Now back to the question of how a person who knows someone who might be moving towards divorce and remarriage can help them.

I would say, first, let them know you care deeply about the pain they're going through. Resonate with them. Come alongside them. Listen to them. Don't make your first emotional agenda to condemn a contemplated action but to hear a heart-cry. That kind of empathy might open a way for you to be more effective.

Once you've come alongside, once you know, once you listen, once you care, truth really does matter. And they may not get it from anybody else.

So you'd want to say, "Can we look at the Scriptures together on this?" And open the Scriptures together and share with them what you see there, and encourage them to follow the Lord very very carefully, even if it's painful. Which would mean not pursuing a divorce unless you're forced to, and not remarrying while your spouse is living.