Singer Charles Billingsley details battle with COVID-19, how it affected his faith
Acclaimed singer/songwriter and pastor Charles Billingsley never expected that leading up to the release of his new album, I Was Made for This, he’d be in the battle for his life against COVID-19.
Billingsley, who is a teaching pastor at Thomas Road Baptist Church in Lynchburg, Virginia, was diagnosed with the novel coronavirus in early April and spent about three weeks battling the virus, which included a brief hospitalization. Simultaneously, his new album — his first studio project in two years — was released on April 10.
The man of faith never expected to release an album during a pandemic, let alone fall victim to the illness. And now he’s sharing his experience to offer hope and encouragement for those in the midst of the national lockdown.
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The following is an edited transcript of The Christian Post's interview with Billingsley, where he shares about how his bout with COVID-19 impacted his faith in God while near death and in isolation.
Christian Post: How were you exposed to COVID-19?
Billingsley: I really don't know how I got exposed to it. I really don't. I take guesses. I was on an airplane in mid-March coming back to Lynchburg and there was a lady in front of me that was really ill and she was coughing a bunch and stuff. But honestly, I don't know if I got it from her or from just somebody [else].
I came down with a fever on Friday night, March 27, which was my 26th wedding anniversary. Then the fever just sort of progressively got worse through the weekend. Then on Monday, the 30th of March, I went and got tested for the flu and it was negative. So my doctor said, "Well, just for fun. I'll check you for this coronavirus, but I don't think you have it. Well, sure enough, two days later on April Fool's Day of all things, it came back positive.
I wasn't very concerned. But unfortunately, this thing grabbed hold of me pretty good and my case went from just fevers and aches and pains and headaches to 10 days straight of 103 degree temperature to eventually being in the hospital with my lungs and it just got really, really nasty.
CP: How did the virus progress?
Billingsley: I get texts every day from people who are having symptoms and they want to know "Hey, what's going on?" Well, for me, it was fever, and then body aches and then really bad headaches. Those three things, really. I never had nausea or anything like that, unless it was a little bit tied to the headache but mainly high fever, 103 degrees for 14 days straight. Then of course, the body aches and the shivers and all that stuff that comes from that. So all I was doing was just taking Tylenol about every four hours; that's all I knew to do. But then I had this strange sensation in the back of my nose and throat, this kind of this dryness. It's not like bronchitis or something. In a cold and stuff, you have a lot of liquid and drainage. This was not. This was a dry something and it was just weird.
I was sitting at my house on April 9 in just misery and of course that was 12 days in and my doctor came over and he said, "Hey, man, I I came over because I want to listen to your lungs. Also I got your blood work back that we did a few days ago" and he said, "I've never seen anything [like this]. Your blood work is horrible. Your numbers are off the chart. Let me listen to your lungs." And he took one listen to my lungs. And he said, "I need you to just walk across the room and come back." I walked across the room, came back and he checked my oxygen and it was at 84 and you're supposed to go on oxygen at 89. So he said, "You know, buddy, I hate to tell you this, but you need to go to the hospital." So what was happening was my air, my breathing was getting more and more shallow and I was still dealing with the fever, still dealing with the aches and pains but now it was a breathing issue. And that's when it gets real serious.
They put me in the hospital just as a precautionary thing. I never had to go on oxygen, thank God. I never had to go on a ventilator, thank God. My doctor looked at my blood work and he said, "Look, if you weren't in good shape, you'd be dead by now. This is unbelievable. So I had a severe case that I didn't realize I had."
CP: While at home were you with your family?
Billingsley: Yeah, my wife. ... And here's the miraculous thing, somehow, someway through three and a half weeks of this mess, my family stayed corona free. I don't know how; it's a miracle of God. The highlight of my day, my wife would bring me a buttered bagel and some grapes. I don't know why but that was the highlight of my day for 24 days and she would come in with her mask and you know she would try to help me all she could and keep my liquids and everything filled up but she was in and out of that room five or six times a day and I don't know how she didn't get it but I'm really grateful for her help.
CP: You ended up in the hospital. How was that experience?
Billingsley: The hospital was the worst part. Mainly because the isolation and just wondering what's next. They really can't give me anything. I was on that Z pack and then hydroxychloroquine. I had gone through two rounds of that and so they really didn't have any medicine to give me. They tried seven times to give me an IV and couldn't do it for some reason. So here I sit in this hospital and all they can do is give me some potassium and Tylenol. That was it.
I was there more just to be on a monitor with my oxygen and there I was in isolation for three days with nobody to talk to and nothing to do except read and worship the Lord.
CP: Spiritually, what's going on in you? Are you feeling like a supernatural type of situation happening along with this illness?
Billingsley: Let me start with the natural side. You have this physical thing going on. I'd go downstairs and my whole family cleared the room, even my dogs were scared of me for crying out loud. So you have this psychological side of this whole thing. Then the emotional side because it just lasts forever and it wears on you. And because of that, from the spiritual perspective of things, I was doing my best just to stay in the Word and keep my mind stayed on the Lord and praying and asking the Lord to heal me and seeking His face and worshiping. But it wasn't until I got in the hospital and I was in total isolation. Then I really had some very powerful moments with the Lord. Some good and not so good.
I mean, that first night I was in the hospital was Thursday night before Easter. I had a brand new record coming out the next day. And I was so frustrated because I couldn't do any interviews or talk to anybody. Here I am and I asked the Lord to heal me. It was one of those moments where I thought, you know what, I'm just gonna ask Him for a miracle. He can heal me. "If you want to heal me, Lord, you can heal me right this second. And I was just literally imagining the lady with the issue of blood reaching out and touching the hem of His garment. Here I am laying in his hospital bed and I'm reaching out as though I'm this lady reaching out for the hem of His garment. I was just seeking the Lord and praying. I really believed He would heal me in that moment and was expecting a miracle. I was expecting to just call the nurses and the doctors and say, "Hey, I'm good. I'll see you later." And that's not what happened. As I laid there, half the night, wide awake, I got more frustrated and more frustrated and then I got angry and disappointed and disillusioned.
I'll never forget laying there on Thursday night, really just sort of upset with the Lord for not healing me like I thought He should. Suddenly, I was reminded that on that very night, 2,000 years prior, the Lord Jesus was in the house of Caiaphas, being beaten within an inch of His life and being spat upon, and His beard being pulled out and suddenly I felt a huge amount of conviction and felt so horrible for being upset over something so small when He went through something so horrific on my behalf.
I think that was kind of a turning point for me because I decided late that night, is probably four in the morning, that maybe instead of asking the Lord to miraculously healing on the timetable that I feel like I should be on, that instead, maybe I should just go to Philippians 4:6,7, which I've quoted 1,000 times but never had to really live — when Paul says, "Be anxious for nothing and in all things with prayer and supplication, make your requests known to God with thanksgiving." And that's when I thought, maybe I should just do what I've told other people to do. Maybe I should just start thanking the Lord for healing me in His time and in His way and I'm just going to be grateful. And I'm just going to believe that it's going to happen. So I turned the corner that night. Then the next day on Good Friday, I spent a great deal of the time that day just listening to worship songs and worshiping the Lord. I had some of the greatest moments with the Lord that I've ever had in that hospital.
CP: You wrestled with God.
Billingsley: Well, it wasn't easy and the problem is every time you wrestle with God, you're the one that comes out limping. It's funny when you wrestle with God, you lose but you end up winning. That's really where I turned the corner that night and I learned something about faith. Faith is an interesting thing. Hebrews tells us that it's the substance of things hoped for, is the evidence of things unseen. I was reminded again that weekend in the hospital, how weak my faith really is, because you see what I was praying for was healing on my terms, on my timetable. What I wanted to do was see the Lord heal me so that I and everyone around me would deepen their belief in Him. But that's not how faith works. Faith is the evidence of things unseen. It's really just the opposite. What I really needed was what the Lord wanted me to do. And that is, rather than seeing Him heal me so that I would believe in Him more, what He really wanted me to do was believe in Him more, and then eventually, I would see Him heal me.
CP: You released an album in the midst of all of this called I Was Made for This. How fitting.
Billingsley: I know the timing of this, it could not be better and it couldn't be worse. I mean, it's crazy. That title cut is really just about living a lifestyle of worship and doing what we were created to do. What I need to remind everybody is that means, not just during the good times, but during the worst of times as well.
CP: So where are you now with everything?
Billingsley: When I was walking out of the hospital, I thought I had a broken left foot because suddenly I couldn't walk on my left foot, it was swollen and it was horrible. Later I find out that I've got these blood clots in both my legs. That's just another residual thing from this virus. So when I got back from the hospital, I had six days of horrible leg pain that I was dealing with. Of course, the pneumonia. Even 10 days after, I'm still dealing with the pneumonia and get my lungs back working. But you know what? The leg pain has subsided, that the lungs are getting better, there's no more fevers, no more waking up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat. Everything is so much better. Today, especially, I feel as close to back to normal as I have yet. I'm just thankful.
It's still active, and it's still happening and it's still really going on with a lot of people and I just pray that we'll all keep obeying these social distancing rules, although I do believe we got to get this country back up or else we're not going to have a country. So it's this hard balance to find to reopen, but at the same time, being careful and all that stuff. So I'm just praying for our nation. I'm praying for our leadership, that we will make the right decisions and somehow, someway, God will see us through this thing.
CP: Where do you think the world will go from here? What do you think are some of the lessons that we're learning?
Billingsley: There's a lot. I mean, first of all, I think it's changed our nation forever, in a lot of ways. It's kind of sad, but I don't think you're going to see a lot of people just walk on up and handshaking and hugging each other like they used to, which is sad to me.
But on a positive note, I think the church has gotten stronger, and it's crazy. Even my church, we've learned through this how to communicate to people outside of the auditorium. Churches all over the world are learning that and now, the community outreach, the daily touches by way of video or zoom meetings or neighborhood walks or whatever. It's amazing how the outreach of the church has increased, exponentially. We used to reach 10, 12,000 people a weekend at my church. Now we're reaching 35, 40,000 people a weekend. So in many ways, the church is experiencing revival through all this. That's a wonderful positive.
I wonder what it's going to be like when we're all back in the room worshiping the Lord again. I hope that through all of this, believers will have deepened their walk with the Lord because, quite frankly, the Lord is forced to Sabbath upon all of us. We have all this time right now, to rest, to study, to learn to worship. I just pray that believers have taken advantage of it because it's like the Lord just said, "Hey, all right, if your life is going to be the economy and your work and all that stuff, I'll just force you to have to be still and know that I'm God." And that's exactly what He's done.
