Five Ways to Turn Your Empty Nest Into a Place of Personal and Professional Growth

The kids are gone. The house is clean and very quiet, leaving you wondering: What, exactly, do I do now?  

After years of carting your children between soccer practice and piano lessons, suddenly finding yourself with lots of free time can feel challenging and even discouraging. Empty nest syndrome — a condition defined as “feelings of depression, sadness, and, or grief experienced by parents and caregivers after children come of age and leave their childhood homes — is a very real phenomenon.

But this time of transition and change doesn't have to be negative. Instead, it can be a time of personal and professional growth, a time to focus on yourself, your interests, and your goals.

Here are five ways to do just that.

Invest in Continued Education

It’s never too late to go back to school. In fact, statistics show increasing numbers of older adults pursuing a degree. From 2000 to 2010, the National Center for Education Statistics reported a staggering 42 percent increase in college students age 25 and older, compared to the 34 percent increase in students younger than 25. Figures also show that adults ages 30 to 64 are most likely to hold master’s, professional, and doctoral advanced degrees.

Whether you want to embark on a new career, start a businesses, expand your skill set, or simply learn more about a topic of interest, investing in continued education is a great way to stimulate your mind, foster personal growth, and grow your professional network.

If you want to further your education — but the idea of returning to a college campus is less than appealing — consider online education. This avenue is becoming increasingly popular; based on federal data from more than 4,700 colleges and universities, more than 6.3 million students in the U.S., most of whom were undergraduates, took at least one online course in Fall 2016, a 5.6 percent increase from the previous year.

Online courses are often less expensive and more flexible than the traditional classroom, making them a great option for students of all ages. Whichever program you choose, the skills you will inevitably gain writing and communicating, thinking critically about relevant issues, and developing a broader understanding of the world around you — are invaluable.

Seek Out Volunteer Opportunities

Volunteering is a healthy way to move past the heartache of the post-parenting years — and improve the world around you. Whether you’re interested in animals, counseling, sports, or nursing, there are numerous volunteer opportunities available in every area. Identify your interests and find an organization that best fits your skill set. Whether you serve others at a church, hospital, school, shelter, or charity, volunteering — even if it’s for just a few hours a week — is a great way to positively impact your local community.

Volunteering isn’t simply an altruistic gesture; it also contributes to self-fulfillment. In a paper published by Harvard Health, authors noted that volunteers experience the “happiness effect.” Compared with people who never volunteered, the odds of being “very happy” rose 7% among those who volunteer monthly and 12% for people who volunteer every two to four weeks. Additionally, studies show that volunteering helps reduce stress, combats depression, and provides a sense of purpose.

Focus on Your Spiritual Health

Amid the busyness of child-rearing, focusing on your spiritual health can sometimes fall by the wayside. With the increased quiet time an empty nest provides, why not dedicate a few hours to your spiritual growth and development? Spending time in the Word of God, praying, or reading a good devotional can ease anxiety, diminish depression, and invigorate and renew your mind.

Dr. Charles Stanley: Radio Host and Pastor of In Touch Ministries in Atlanta, puts it this way: “Like farmers planting a crop, we need to understand what seeds to use in order to harvest what we desire. This is because we reap what we sow — a principle that is true no matter what season in life we're experiencing. So if we wish to stay spiritually fruitful as we grow older, we should look to the One who never ages or fails.

He teaches us everything that will help us continue maturing spiritually. The deeper we take root in our relationship with God — increasing our intimacy with Him and obeying His call — the greater access we have to His eternal nature and boundless resources.”

Becoming active in your local church is another excellent way to foster spiritual growth. Numerous studies have also found that religious people tend to be less depressed and less anxious than non-believers. A 2015 survey by researchers at the London School of Economics and the Erasmus University Medical Center in the Netherlands found that participating in a religious organization was the only social activity associated with long-term happiness, outweighing the benefits of volunteering for a charity, taking educational courses or participating in a political or community organization.

Invest in Your Physical Health

Physical health, just like spiritual health, is essential to overall well-being. Studies show that participating in 150 to 300 minutes of exercise a week can significantly boost happiness and lessen depression and anxiety. Additionally, a recent Harvard study found that exercise creates an upward spiral of healthy behaviors and positive emotions.

Perhaps this is why Scripture tells us that God is concerned about our physical state; 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 says: "Do you not know that your body is the temple (the very sanctuary) of the Holy Spirit Who lives within you, Whom you have received [as a Gift] from God? You are not your own, you were bought with a price [purchased with a preciousness and paid for, made His own]. So then, honor God and bring glory to Him in your body."

Similarly, Romans 12:1 says to "make a decisive dedication of your bodies [presenting all your members and faculties] as a living sacrifice, holy (devoted, consecrated) and well pleasing to God, which is your reasonable (rational, intelligent) service and spiritual worship."

Identify something you love — whether it’s walking, dancing, gardening, or yoga — and dedicate a few hours a week to participating in that activity. The correlation between positive emotions and healthy behaviors cannot be underestimated.

Grow Your Relationships

Oftentimes, when children leave the house, couples find that much of their marriage was centered around their offspring and their various activities. Focus on the Family offers these tips for rekindling a marriage post-parenting.

• Make an intentional effort to improve communication in your marriage.
• Get involved in social activities, a church fellowship group, or a ministry project (such as Habitat for Humanity) that you can tackle together.
• Connect with other "empty nesters" who are facing similar challenges.
• Consider the possibility of mentoring a young person in your community who is separated from his or her mother or father and who desperately needs the influence of older, wiser, and more experienced Christian friends.
• Take up a hobby or recreational activity (for example, golf) that the two of you can learn to enjoy together.

Even if your marriage is strong and healthy, there is always room for growth and development. Spend time with your spouse, go on a vacation together, and work to re-invigorate your love for one another.

Single parents can also combat loneliness by developing new friendships and/or taking the time to improve already existing friendships. Invite someone over for a casual dinner party, ask a friend to participate in a workout class, join a local church group, or simply resolve to entertain more often. Proverbs 17:17 reads, “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.”

Empty nesting is a time of transition and change, and can, for some parents, be a stressful and scary time. Choose to embrace these years and make them a time of personal and professional growth by investing in your mental, physical, spiritual and emotional health.

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