What Are the Lies Christians Tell Themselves About Porn Addiction?
Christians who are hooked on porn often belittle themselves by thinking, "God must be so ashamed of me" or "I'm the only one struggling with porn like this."
But these thoughts are nothing but lies, according to Stephen Kuhn from XXX Church, an online ministry dedicated to people with porn and sex addictions.
"These thoughts are present in almost every case of pornography addiction I've seen," Kuhn wrote on the ministry's website. "Worse yet, they keep you from discovering the truth that will set you free."
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Christians tell themselves other lies about their addictions. For instance, Kuhn said porn addicts mistakenly think that their addiction defines who they are.
However, the truth is that only God can define people, he said. "The only One who can give you your true identity is God, because He is the One who made you. Furthermore, the moment you trust Christ to redeem you from your sins, all of them — past, present, and future — are removed from you," he explained.
Another lie is that pornography addiction is all about fulfilling sexual desires. In truth, it's only an attempt to receive intimacy without the fear of rejection, Kuhn said. Many men are terrified of being rejected if people discover the truth about themselves, so they hide their flaws and turn to pornography, he explained.
"In reality though, the shame that comes from using porn fuels their isolation and drives them farther away from the true intimacy they are searching for," he said.
The biggest lie about porn addiction is that it separates users from God's love. Kuhn reminded Christians that no sin can ever separate them from God's unconditional love.
"God will never, ever pull away from you regardless of what you've done in your life. His love for you is unconditional — which means your behavior has nothing to do with it," he said. "Furthermore, trusting His love frees you to trust Him as a compassionate Father rather than fearing Him as an angry judge. This is the beautiful gift of His Grace."
Earlier, Paul Robinson also wrote on the group's blog that the biggest hindrance Christians face in their battle with pornography is their obsession with sin. A lot of believers want to be in control of their sins, and they play an endless game of "How Can I Not Screw Up Anymore."
Because of this, Christians are so weighed down by the stress of not being a moral failure that they fail to truly enjoy life. They feel terrified of freedom because it requires them to give up their need for control.
But Robinson said true freedom for a believer in Jesus Christ only means they are no longer controlled by the standards other people have set for them. "If we really think about it, we have no standards to reach anymore, because there is nothing we can do to be accepted. You can screw up everyday for the rest of your life or never screw up again," he said. "God welcomes you. Period."
