Does Mankind Really Need Men?
Men don't matter.
As long as there are sperm donors available, kids can be raised just as well by a mom or two as by a dad and mom. In fact, given the aggressive and non-committal nature of men, it's probably best that they just stay out of the family picture.
This is the picture painted in an August 2012 New York Times article where writer Greg Hampikian makes the point that "women are both necessary and sufficient for reproduction, men are neither." Hampikian acknowledges that his own father was the more influential parent in his life but returns to arguing the scientific irrelevance of men. "Ultimately," he asks, "the question is, does 'mankind' really need men?"
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If you're a man, I have good news for you, and I have sobering news as well.
The good news: You do matter. Despite the questions our society often raises about the value of men, and especially fathers (think Homer Simpson), you have a deeply important calling as a man. Your presence and your words have an enormous impact on those around you.
The sobering news: You matter. Your words and presence have impact, but that impact can go either way. It can bring life, security and blessing to others, especially wives and children; or it can bring fear, shame and violence.
Despite the poor choices many men make, I'm utterly convinced that we absolutely do matter. For four reasons:
1. God's revelation of himself
When God created humankind and revealed himself as a personal, loving God, he did so as a Father (Psalm 89:26; 103:12-14). He always used masculine pronouns in reference to himself. And when Jesus told the magnificent parable of the Prodigal Son, (Luke 15:11-32), he was revealing the heart of the Father. The image of God throughout Scripture is masculine.
That places a spiritual mantle on men, fathers in particular, to be aware that we reflect God's revealed nature in every relationship we have. This is why the love, presence and touch of a man carries enormous weight—for condemnation or blessing. Even non-Christian therapists know that most children's view of God is shaped by their fathers.
A child with a kind, patient, present, loving Father can easily embrace those same qualities in God. She's familiar with them. The child with a distant, angry, vindictive, shaming father intuitively assigns those same qualities to God. He knows them all too well.
2. Jesus's masculine presence
When Jesus took on flesh and blood and confined himself to the limitations of humanity, he came as a male. He was a son and a boy who, "grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man" (Luke 2:52 NIV). He taught in the temple as young Jewish men did and surrounded himself with a group of men who became his brothers.
Jesus revealed himself as a man and in doing so gave all men a clear picture of who we can aspire to be. Kind yet filled with conviction. Connected deeply to the Father yet pursuing masculine community. Courageous enough to stand face-to-face with pious Pharisees (Matt. 3:7; 12:34), yet gentle enough to convince women they were entirely safe with him (John 4).
Jesus shows us how to be men. When we emulate him, we reflect godly, masculine qualities to others at home, at work, at church and in the community.
3. Fathers are the first "other"
Several Christian authors make the point that fathers are the first outside person a child has awareness of. A child is utterly connected with his or her mother through nine months of sharing the same body, through the life-giving umbilical cord, and through breast-feeding. In a baby's earliest development, he or she has no distinct awareness of a life separate from the mother.
The father isn't physically connected and he isn't the source of nurture in the intimate way the mother is, but he's there. He's the first "other" person who chooses whether to pay attention, connect, engage, talk to or hug a child. Whether he does or not makes an enormous difference.
A father's abandonment, absence or abuse can pass on a lifetime of woundedness. Conversely, his voice, love and presence can bestow a lifetime blessing (Genesis 49:25, 26). Fathers are the first influence that convinces a child whether she or he matters.
4. The impact of men on societies
"One of the most important tasks for any society is to answer the question: How do we build good men?" So said radio commentator Dennis Prager the day after the shootings at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut. At first, I questioned his comment. Women are equally important in God's eyes as men.
And then I realized Prager is right. He's not talking about the relative value of men and women; he's talking about consequences. Men matter precisely because the consequences of the character choices they make differ so significantly. Good men bring generational blessing to families and society; wicked men bring multiplied destruction (Exodus 20:5, 6).
Men matter because the difference between good men and wicked men is so extreme. Men have a disproportionate impact on society, especially when it comes to violence. I am utterly convinced those same men have the opposite potential for an equally significant impact for blessing, provision and protection.
This is why we men have such a life-impacting choice to make: Will we direct our energy to bring blessing or destruction to others?
Our society questions the value of men primarily because it sees too many examples of broken men—men who long for power, possessions or prestige. The world desperately needs men who are convinced they matter for reasons far deeper than intimidation, control or destruction. Men who grasp their importance will be freed to use their strength, not for harm, but for the benefit of others.
Like it or not, men matter.
Let's make sure it's in the right way.
Craig Glass is the founder and president of Peregrine Ministries with the mission to guide and inspire men on their life journey. He has served as vice president of ministries at International Teams, pastor to men at Willow Creek Community Church, and national director of field ministries at International Students Incorporated. Craig blogs about faith and manhood at PeregrineMinistries.org. His latest book, Noble Journey: The Quest for a Lasting Legacy, was released in February.
