Overcoming The Forgiveness Barrier: 3 Pieces Of Advice When Forgiving Someone Is the Last Thing You Want To Do
Humans as we are, we get offended and hurt. There are times when the pain is too much we put "forgiveness" on the farthest end of the list, making it the last thing we want to give or do to our offender.
Have you ever felt that way? If you're struggling with forgiving someone right now, here's something for you.
Overcoming Unforgiveness
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Forgiveness is a very precious thing. Consider it as some sort of sink drain plug that, when taken away, allows all the pent up and stored up feelings of anger and bitterness to drain away and set us free to live life without any baggages and unnecessary weights. And oh, forgiveness isn't only for the offender – it's for the offended too.
To help you overcome unforgiveness and release forgiveness to each and every person who has offended you, here are three things you should keep in mind.
1) Remember that you were forgiven too
All of us have committed sin, and no matter how "small" they may seem, they earn the divine and holy wrath of God (see Romans 3:23, 6:23). Thankfully, He wants to forgive us, and has sent His one and only begotten Son to purchase that forgiveness for us using His blood (see John 3:16; 1 John 2:2).
Thanks to the blood of Christ, our repentance is met with forgiveness (see Hebrews 9:22, 28; 10:10). There's nothing we could do to make it right with God, but Christ gave us the way to do it: through Him.
Christ shed His blood so that we could be forgiven. We didn't deserve it, but He loved us and so He did it.
2) Remember that God commands us to forgive
Friend, not only are we forgiven through Christ. We are also commanded to forgive those who offend us. Read what Jesus told Peter in Matthew 18:21-22,
"Then Peter came to Him and said, "Lord, how often shall I forgive my brother who sins against me? Up to seven times?" Jesus said to him, "I do not say to you up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven."
Forgiveness should be second-nature to us. No it doesn't mean automatically trusting the offender again, but it does mean letting go of the offense and leaving it up to the Lord. Read Romans 12:17-21 for more detail.
3) Remember that it's good for you in many ways
We are told to forgive because if we don't forgive, God won't forgive us either. Consider what Jesus said in Matthew 6:14-15,
"For if you forgive men for their sins, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men for their sins, neither will your Father forgive your sins."
Also, realize that unforgiveness breeds bitterness, which is a very dangerous thing. Consider what the writer to the Hebrews said about it:
"Pursue peace with all men, and the holiness without which no one will see the Lord, watching diligently so that no one falls short of the grace of God, lest any root of bitterness spring up to cause trouble, and many become defiled by it..." (see Hebrews 12:14-15 emphasis mine)
In Conclusion
Friend, choose to forgive. Let go of the unnecessary weight so that you can run the race and win the prize that awaits us at the end. (see Hebrews 12:1-3)
