Loving the LBGT while having a differing definition of love
Most would agree that love is the supreme ethic in which we live by, but the two loudest voices on love have historically disagreed on the definition. The LBGTQ+ and the Evangelical Christian community have seemingly been at odds for as long as any of us can remember. Ironically, their biggest disagreement has been their biggest commonality - love.
So as Christians, who without a doubt carry the burden and responsibility to love, how do we love the LBGTQ+ community with differing definitions of love.
1. BE CONSISTENT
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It was the religious folk, the religious elite, whom Jesus called hypocrites. It was the religious folk who would preach from the Scriptures and yet were more worried about Jewish tradition and rituals than caring for the people. Are we as Christians any different today?
What we rightfully ask of those who have same-sex attraction, is to see a relationship with a perfect and loving God as more rewarding than their fleshly desires for same-sex relationships. The problem arises when we do not ask the same of our straight, Christian brothers and sisters. How often do we publicly comment or encourage our congregations to put aside their sinful desires for fornication, adultery, or lust?
You see, the whole idea of putting aside desires that seem so natural, is one that recognizes that our sinful desires could never fill the void that “Love” does, God’s love. If there is any chance that others would understand this, it is in our consistency that this truth must be communicated. We cannot yell this truth at our homosexual neighbors as we whisper it to our brothers and sisters in the church.
Now, I understand that there is a public platform that the issue of homosexuality has that makes a whisper of sound doctrine seem like a megaphone of hate. We should never compromise the Word of God for comfort in culture - that is counter to the Gospel itself; but we also must trust that “wisdom (herself) shouts in the streets and lifts her voice in the square.” (Proverbs 1:20)
In an evangelical community that has scared us into believing that if we stop talking, then secular culture will win the hearts and minds of people - What would happen if we let God speak to the hearts and minds of people? What would happen if we focused on being consistent; living out what we have preached?
Is it possible that God will make His words known to them, that they may turn to His reproof, and God pour out His Spirit on them? (Proverbs 1:23)
As Christians, we must continue to remind ourselves how much we need to put aside our pride, our self-righteousness, and (most important in this context) our sexual immorality - citing our own relationship with God as more worthy than the desires of our flesh. If we believe His love is far greater than any “love” we could find on earth; then let us not be so self-centered that we think our human relationships outweigh the majesty of a personal and intimate relationship with God.
2. COMMUNICATE WHAT THEY ALREADY UNDERSTAND
It is so like our God, that in His sovereignty the LBGTQ+ community would pick a flag, unbeknownst to them, that represents the grace of God - that represents His heart. His heart that wishes not to destroy and is grieved when He must. The rainbow, a symbol of His goodness and faithfulness; represents His heart to love, pursue, and to give life. God can use anything and everything for good and for His glory (Genesis 50:20); and in His sovereignty, He pursues this community by literally robing them in His faithfulness.
How often do our opponents cite God’s love in attempt to “correct” our views? It often takes form as a question, i.e. “Doesn’t God love everyone?” Or “Wouldn’t God want me to be happy?”
If a conversation about the love of God is one others are willing to have, then this is a prime opportunity for the sharing of the gospel. Too often when these questions are asked of us, we shallowly see it as just an opportunity to answer their question as opposed to their deepest spiritual need.
What better opportunity to share with them the gospel of Jesus Christ? One of the most powerful and impactful things I’ve seen in sharing the gospel with those who are hostile towards it, is sharing the words of Jesus. Many times, they are shocked to know that Jesus has many of the same qualms with religion that they do.
Get them interested in the person of Christ and they will hear His words in a way they may have never heard them before - from His mouth as opposed from ours. It is the kindness of God that draws men to repentance (Romans 2:4), and we trust that He will affirm His goodness and faithfulness to them who suspect it already.
3. PURSUE THEM
Most human relationships are founded on selfish motives. Motives that seek only to satisfy self and not to sacrifice. So how counter-cultural would it be to find them where they are and love them. Not so we could fill a seat in our local churches, but so that God could fill a void in their heart.
That is the Great Commission! Not that we would merely fill churches but that God would fill us as He reconciles people to Himself. We must not see people as a means to an end, but as an end in themselves. That is how God see us - that is how God treated us. “For the joy set before Him, He endured the cross” (Hebrews 12:2). It was not that the people would lead to His joy, it was that the people in and of themselves were His joy.
If we have the mind of Christ, then let us have the eyes of Christ that sees people as He sees them and a heart that pursues them as He pursues them.
Be where they are. Go where they go. And love them beyond their definition.
Marcus Tatum is a pastor-in-training at Commitment Church in Southern New Jersey. He currently co-leads the spiritual development ministry at his church while pursuing his Masters in Biblical Studies at The Master’s University.
